In His Shoes

I’m not by nature a very open person. It takes awhile for me to get to a comfortable point with other people, where I feel like I can lay it all out on the table. In 2008 I finally took the plunge and realized the internal conflicts I was constantly battling from day to day could be conquered with medication. And then a whole new world opened up- one where I could focus and keep thoughts straight, and the daily battles never felt as though they needed to fought anymore. They just went away.

Sometimes I wonder what he feels like- when the world becomes too much for him and the daily battles just can’t be fought, where does he find the solace? How does he move on? He’s learned and developed self coping skills, but there are times where the world is no match even for those skills. Does he feel like I did? Overwhelmed by life and ready to just lay down and cry until the feelings go away? There’s so much we are still learning about him- and so much that fascinates me and I wish I could crawl inside his head and figure out. But I can’t, so I’m left here wondering.